Hermione Granger & the Mockingjay Cast Fire at Twi
by ashlynthestory-creator
Summary: "Hey! I'm going to get Edward to come and kick your butt!" said Bella. "Really! I can hex ickle sparkly fairly princess in seconds," "You are to kind Hermione," Katniss said. "I'll shoot him for you!" First Harry Potter/Hunger Games one-shot!


Hermione Granger and the Mockingjay 'Cast Fire' at Twilight

"Will it kill you to smile?" A brilliant girl said sharply with a beautiful, crisp British accent.

"Edward commands you," smirked the tall, athletic one.

"What is there to smile about Harmony and Kate," said the bleak one dully.

"It's Hermione," she snapped. "It's not our fault your creator gave you pathetic common names."  
"Yeah, the squirrels I hunt probably have a more intelligent mind," Katniss joked.

"You wish that your name means 'Beautiful Swan'." Bella snapped back.

"Yeah you're as beautiful as a Basilisk." Hermione muttered to Katniss.

"Basilisk?" she asked.

"Imagine Bella here with dark skin, liveliness and personality,"

"Ahhhh," Katniss said comprehensively. "I see what you did there,"  
"Aren't those people cute?" gossiped Bella, oblivious to the teasing.

"Ugh, no more boys, I have suck one's face to get out of the arena alive," Katniss said grimly.

"Do you like Peeta or Gale," Bella pressed.

"Who cares, it's not like they'll provide for me," Katniss scoffed.

"How about you, Harmony? Harry or Ron,"

"I've been with Ron since 97', can't you read?" Hermione said irritably.

"Let's not go there," Katniss said smartly.

"I still can't decide over Edward or Jacob,"  
"You can eat a wolf, dog –whatever the hell he is- and Eddie is like a hundred years old. You're creator clearly has no common sense," Katniss said.

"Or any sense," Hermione said. "Didn't you say you liked Edward though,"  
"But Jacob get's so angry without me!" Bella whined.

"Are you for real," Katniss sighed. "I swear if either of you're guys were in the hunger games, they'd be dead in a day. I'll catch that puppy with an easy snare and the sparkling mess would be sighted from a mile away,"  
"Well all Hermione's boys do is wave stupid sticks around and go to the pig palace,"  
"Hogwarts. We go to Hogwarts." Hermione said through clenched teeth. "I know it doesn't sound pretty or anything, but at least it is original. Just proves that brains –not beauty- is cool. And those sticks will kill you in an instant! Harry killed the one of the powerful wizard in the world with a simple, disarming charm!"

"That's all that's in your story. Fighting a creepy wizard," Bella sneered.

"Please, Professor Snape saying 'Always' conquered your sick lustrous romance," Hermione said briskly.

"One line? We've had books about our love!" Bella replied weakly.

"Good lord," Hermione said to Katniss, she nodded soberly in response. "We've got tons of types of love! Professor Snape's love for Lily practically spared her life! But her love for her only son made her stand in the way of the curse, thus protecting him! And Ron and I've never thought that we would be together when we first met –it took time to develop our love for another- and same goes for Tonks and Lupin! The Weasley's are the most loving family I've seen, even Percy has changed. The Cullens' personalities compare to that of a whomping willow!"

"Hey! I'm going to get Edward to come and kick your butt!"  
"Really! I can hex ickle sparkly fairly princess in seconds,"  
"You are to kind Hermione," Katniss said. "I'll shoot him for you!"

"Huh! I feel so sorry for you! You have to get dirty in an area be outside in all that sunshine," Bella said, smacking herself clumsily as she brushed her limp, dark bangs out of her pale face.

"Yeah, that's the hard part," Katniss said sarcastically.

"And you had to choose between really hot boys!"  
"That made my life terrible. The hunger, the rebellion, my family's life is nothing compared to the boys."

"What do you mean by that?" Bella said coolly. "Don't make me get Edward!"  
"There she goes again!" Katniss said frustratedly. She drew out an arrow and positioned it so it would Target Bella's mouth. "Either you run into your sparkly man's arm like a helpless little fawn or shut up! Nothing you'll say will ever defend your character or book! Hermione's smart and tough! I'm a symbol of rebellion and a fighter! You're this petty little 1700's housewife whose story was a freaking horrible waste of a forest."  
"You wish you're stories were as popular as ours! You know what our fans would do for us!"  
"Hey!" Hermione drew out her wand. "If I dressed up as Voldemort and crashed a screening of any of your pathetic movies' I'll have a million followers. If you crashed one of our screenings dressed like puppy dog Jacob, you'll just look stupid. Our first books were more complex than your entire damn love story! You know what? A love potion is more complex than _Twilight_!"

"No it isn't!" Bella said helplessly. "Edward! Edward! Come tell them how good our love is,"  
"Shall we Hermione?" Katniss said, a smile tugging at her lips.

Hermione glanced between her friend and the excuse of a living thing. _House elves would love her muggle attire!_

"Stupefy!"

A silver arrow was released from the bow.

XXX

"I love the outline so far,"

"It's brilliant, isn't it Suzanne?"  
"Should we consult Stephanie on the use of her character?"  
"What character? The rabbit I wrote about in my story Rabbit when I was six had more character traits than Bella! I also despise her of wrecking the name 'Bella!'" Joanne said loudly.  
"I know, it must be horrible that dark, evil Bellatrix shares the name with petty little Isabella." Suzanne said sympathetically. "Aw well, every one with a right mind would pick your Bella,"  
"I'd actually want to watch Katniss pierce Bella in the heart,"  
"That could be easily arranged!"  
"Cheers!" The writers clinked their teacups and began to start the first chapter.

_Thank you so much for reading! I hoped you liked it! Sorry for not including many Hunger Games references, I still have to read the last one. Please Review! _


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